If you’re a die hard fan of Airboy, you’ve probably read about Melissa and her adventures in the Sandpit through her blog TampaxTowers because we mentioned her quite a few times. We, at Airboy, discovered her ramblings way back when I was still serving those minted Americans at the Westin Hotel in Paris. It was back when I applied to be a Cabin Crew for Emirates and before my Open Day. I googled “Emirates Cabin Crew Blog” – as many of you do daily – and clicked the first link I saw (unfortunately for misses now, I have the first spot up there in the results mwouahahahahah). I got hooked… along with other bloggers I will try to interview later on.

http://tampaxtowers.blogspot.com

Not only did I get the job. Not only did I move to Dubai 6 months ago. I even got a flat under miss M. We met a couple times already but with our messy rosters it is hard to have a chat. In actual fact it’s a right Kerfuffle.

So where where we, oh yeah… I have attempted to interview her via email, although I could have hoped on the lift and ask her some questions, but no, we Cabin Crew like to keep our distances. But in a matter of minutes, M. came with the answer to my email. So here is the entire ITW of Landlordess of the Tampax Towers blog.

Airboy : Hi there Melissa, hope you’re nice and comfy, cause this might take some time. No flights to catch in the next hour or so ?

Melissa : Well I am supposed to be sleeping for a Doha…

A : Sorry I’m pestering you during your rest… Ok, let’s carry on, you have a blog called Tampax Towers upon the internetz and it’s getting quite a fair amount of readers… How do you cope with the sudden fame ?

M : I kinda had to edit some previous posts, the blog was featured in a local newspaper here and some people at work had alerted me to it, and I didn’t want to end up the next Queen of the Sky. Aside from that I haven’t had to do anything differently, anyone that has read it has been supportive and in general the response has been positive.

A : Oh well, I heard you have friends in the higher spheres such as Tiger Woods, what is he like ?

M : Er, I just have a photo with him taken last year during the Dubai Desert classic. He was really sweet to us girls, kept offering us chocolates from the refreshment fridges they have at every tee on the course, and got really excited when he saw there were Kit Kats in there.

A : Right O’. What is this love/hate relationship you maintain with Etisalat, tell us more about it !

M : They screw up my internet! And now that it’s working, they haven’t sent me a single bill! It’s been 3 months now and I’ve been to the branch in person twice now to sort this out, I mean I want to give them money but if they don’t send me a bill of course my payments are gonna be late! Grrrr.

A : I had a few issues with them, I’ve suscribed for their TV pack a month ago and they still haven’t showed up… but that’s for later. Ok now down to business. How long does it take you to get that lipstick on ? What about that hat & scarf, how do you manage to keep it as beige as it is ?? You know with the wind it can get stained either with foundation or that red stuff… tell our other Cabin Crew readers how you deal with such an issue !

M : Two words – wet wipes.

A : The other day I was in the crew bus dosing off to my iPod after a horrible turnaround and you climbed on… You didn’t want to disturb me, was this part of the “Promote Privacy” policy you were following ? Did you actually take your shoes off and walked on your toes so I could take a nap ?

M : I didn’t disturb you because your body language screamed “Do Not Disturb”. Plus I feared that if I introduced yourself whilst you were fragile after such a flight, that the can of Coke you had in your hand would prompty end up somewhere on my uniform. Lemme guess, you’re not that much of a morning person…

A : Google LOL. It’s true though, I look like a year old lettuce after dreadful turnarounds… awww classic… Ok next question, you’re in the bus heading to the CBC for a flight bound for Hyderabad in India, which track will your iPod Touch play ?

M : Anything by Ben Folds.

Ben folds sounds something like this :
[audio:http://240plan.ovh.net/~redcandy/airboy/wp-content/uploads/2008/09/22%20Brick%20(Acoustic).mp3] Ben Folds – Brick (acoustic)

A : And if it was a flight to Perth, Australia ?

M : The Flight of the Conchords album.

The Flight Of The Conchords sounds something like this :
[audio:http://240plan.ovh.net/~redcandy/airboy/wp-content/uploads/2008/09/01%20Business%20Time.mp3] The Flight Of The Conchords – Business Time

A : Tell us more about your hometown, Perth, can you describe the city for our readers ? The people, maybe tell us where to go while on Layover there !?? That would be fantastic.

M : If you’re on a layover go to Northbridge as it’s where the decent clubs and resturants are. Go for a bike ride along the river if the weather’s nice. If you have a day free, you can go to Fremantle (Freo) and have the best Fish & Chips at Cicerellos, then skull a coffee at Gino’s on the Cappucino strip. And don’t be surprised if you can’t find a 7/11 or Starbucks. There aren’t any.

A : Ohhh sounds snazzz. I come from Paaaaaarrrreeeee ! Have you ever been there ?

M : Yes but not since 2005

A : What did you like best apart from the cheese, the bread, the monuments, the shopping, the great fashion style we have and of course the awesomeness of French males…?

M : The accent. Actually any Euro accent I find zexy.

A : Tell us about the worst flight you have ever operated, be kind, loose the names for confidential reasons… !

M : It was Moscow around Feb this year. I have a post about it on my blog, but to summarise there was blood, urine, faeces and vomit everywhere in Economy. There were even punches thrown. Thank goodness I was working business. Mind you, I would do a Moscow layover again in a heartbeat.

A : If you had the liberty of choosing your door for a flight, which one would it be and why ?

M : It depends on which cabin. In economy I always chose the galley if there was one, if not then I would chose the most aft RHS door because passengers wouldn’t see your bloodshot eyes from sleep deprivation. In premium cabins it was always the Duty Free, cause I need the $$$ for my next big investment gamble.

A : I bet you had a crush on a Crew before, give us names !

M : I’m not giving any names, but yes there was one. I got really hurt. That’s all I’m saying.

A : Back in Dubai now… What could you add to the city’s already thriving environment to make your life here much more enjoyable ? (for example, I could definately do with a french bakery at the bottom of the building instead of a Avis Rental Car boutique)…

M : I would love a fresh juice bar somewhere on my side of SZR. And a Spinneys within walking distance. And a Lime Tree cafe.

A : Ok, what do you think of our wonderful taxi drivers ? A one word sentence can do the trick…

M : Dangerous

A : What is your favourite container in the AFT galley ? Tell me you luuuuuuuuuuve these Ginger Nuts !

M : The baby amenities, because you can play tricks with the new GR2’s using a nappy and a bar of chocolate. And any day when the dry stores have Oreos is a good day indeed.

A : Did you ever get lost trying to find the FedEx counter in the headquarters ?

M : No, I refuse to send mail from here, the one and only time I sent something it arrived 5 months late.

A : No ! I would of guess so, I’m the only sad twat who looks for a FedEx counter on my days off… *sigh*. Do you miss you training college days ?

M : No. Aside from getting gasto from the Cafeteria, there was a huge falling out within our batch. I quite like the SEP recurrent days though.

A : We have potentially dangerous jobs up there at 35,000 feet, but on ground, have you ever feared for your life here in Dubai ?

M : Only in a Taxi

A : Ok so I think we’ll wrap it up here, one last question. How did you find out about Airboy and his blog ?

M : I have spies around the internets. Gotta know who my competition are 😉

A : Thanks ever so much for taking your week off to answer my questions, much appreciated. Speak to you soon and keep blogging !

So that’s our first Interview ever wrapped. Hope you enjoyed it as much as I enjoyed putting this together. I’ve sent a couple questions over to other CCs around Dubai so surely we’ll have some more of those in the near future. Arrivedecci people. Speak to you soon.